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Christmas 2021🎄 Is it really Christmassy?

is it just me, or the last week of the year feels a little sad?
i remember when i was thirteen, my parents would decorate a christmas tree. it made me happy. 
a few chocolates, good food, few presents and what else does a thirteen-year-old want anyway.

as you grow older, the gifts you want from christmas aren't
the ones that your mom can get you in the evening. it gets tricky.
you want love. you want happiness. you want a life which is peaceful. you want compassion and understanding people around you. 
can santa gift happiness to a twenty three year-old?

i know, i can't find happiness but talking to a handful of people who matter to me, receiving a few messages that light up my mood and getting a few presents for my lil sister, spending time with my family who really are never intimidated by my presence unlike others who think I'm wierd or damaged just because i Don't follow the crowd or i don't fit in their groups, penning down my thoughts at one place when I feel overwhelmed and doze off, is sufficiently close to my definition of happiness.

The older you get, you realise you have to keep things to yourself, keep your circle small and be selective of what you utter because not everyone holds your well being in their interests. Not everyone finds happiness in your happiness. You have to become absolutely okay with not being liked, because no matter how caring, loving, or kind you be, you will never be able to people please your way into collective acceptance. You can be a whole ray of sunshine and people can still hate you because they are used to rain. You have to still be Okay with shining regardless. 

So, despite all the sadness surrounding, I still hope that our heart be awed by the sacred moments in the coming year

May we all be inspired by giving and changed by love.

May we all be filled with peace and touched by miracles. 

May all our days be merrier, brighter and as soft as silk ✨♥️


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